***first written in late 2020 and submitted to a previous Asian and Pacific Islander based LGBTQ+ organization I was involved with (I think the org is now defunct lol), that never did end up posting the following review. Long way to say, here it is on my site instead! ☺
*DISCLAIMER: the movie touches on anti-Black racism in a few early scenes, and I felt that the later scenes, that were supposed to depict Ma’s ‘change’ in her racist stereotypes of Black folks, were disingenuous; I don’t think she addresses her racism at all during the course of the movie, nor was it brought up as a problem. The interactions between Ma and Wil’s neighbor, who is Black, did not age well in the slightest, especially because of the surge of murders and violent crimes on Black bodies in recent years, and also because of the increasing rise in Asian hate crime and general xenophobic behaviors since the pandemic. In any case, I am taking these scenes in this otherwise well-written movie as a reminder to keep fighting for the liberation of all peoples under white supremacy and its racist ideologies, and to fight against our own internal racist thoughts and stereotypes. Cross-racial solidarity starts with each one of us.
Alice Wu introduces us to the quintessential Chinese American social scene of three family generations in Chinatown, New York, with all the glory of the awkwardness and freedom of the early 2000s… But with the curve of lesbianism, older motherhood, death, and classicism, set within the rigid social customs of “saving face”.
The phrase “saving face” is a widely used concept with many nuances within the Asian diaspora, especially within Chinese culture. It thrives on positive and well-regarded interactions within the community and society, as respect begets respect. Consequently, disrespect begets disrespect, and negative mannerisms causing unpleasant situations would be to not “save face”; to “lose face” instead. “Losing (one’s) face” affects the hierarchy and stability of rigid Chinese family generations, and has emotional and sometimes physical consequences to the perpetrators of the perceived indignity upon the family and community.
This witty dramedy is interwoven with ingenious scenes metaphorically defining this loss of honor; the movie actually opens with the protagonist Wilhemina putting a facial mask on (!). it’s definitely relatable even in 2021 to watch the judgemental and sometimes full-on intolerant mentality displayed throughout the movie on screen towards the non binary; of gender roles, family roles, attraction of gender even, etc. The repression of the freedom of expression and the joy of individual pursuit is conveyed clearly by the many veiled insults and mocking gossip, amongst the more heated and dramatic scenes laced in Wil’s life as she navigates her work as a doctor with her growing crush on Vivian, a ballet dancer also within the same Chinese American community (or at least their parents are, which is how they met), as well as in Ma (Wil’s mother)’s life as she traverses pregnancy as an older woman with its social and emotional consequences.
The intimacy of lesbianism is explored by Wu without the patriarchal gaze that seems to ooze boobily (can you tell I’m trying to write like a male writer, hur hur) in most love scenes in most movies. Their two shadow silhouettes blend into one, and like that metaphor, Wil finally lets Viv into her heart, as Viv tenderly pulls Wil into her arms. Their nakedness together both physically and mentally is a very refreshing reminder of what genuine warmth and respect in loving relationships is without sexualization. As both Wil and Viv are not only lesbians, but Asian lesbians, their frustrations are intersectional, and their arguments are very much culturally-driven, or at the very least, culturally introduced.
At the end, the exhubilant liberation, empowerment, and agency that both mother and daughter achieve by “losing face” is a beautiful future for our current progress of cultural and revolutionary change against homophobes, transphobes, racists, and white supremacists to achieve in reality, too.
4.8/5
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